Self-Discipline

"Self-discipline is a form of freedom. Freedom from laziness and lethargy, freedom from the expectations and demands of others, freedom from weakness and fear—and doubt. Self-discipline allows a pitcher to feel his individuality, his inner strength, his talent. He is master of, rather than a slave to, his thoughts and emotions." — H.A. Dorfman The Mental ABCs of Pitching   

 "The individual who wants to reach the top in business must appreciate the might and force of habit. He must be quick to break those habits that can break him—and hasten to adopt those practices that will become the habits that help him achieve the success he desires." — J. Paul Getty
 

"We are what we repeatedly do, excellence then is not an act, but a habit." — Aristotle

 

"Success is actually a short race—a sprint fueled by discipline just long enough for habit to kick in and take over." — Gary Keller

 

"Success is a matter of understanding and religiously practicing specific, simple habits that always lead to success." — Robert J. Ringer

 

"The good Lord gave you a body that can stand most anything. It's your mind you have to convince." — Vince Lombardi

 

"Mastering others is strength. Mastering yourself is true power." — Lao Tzu

 

"Rule your mind or it will rule you." — Horace

 

"If we don't discipline ourselves, the world will do it for us." — William Feather  

"The first and best victory is to conquer self."

— Plato, Greek Philosopher

 

"Talent without discipline is like an octopus on roller skates. There's plenty of movement, but you never know if it's going to be forward, backwards, or sideways."

— H. Jackson Brown, Jr., Author

 "It is not enough to have great qualities; We should also have the management of them." 

— La Rochefoucauld

"A man without decision of character can never be said to belong to himself . . . . He belongs to whatever can make captive of him." — John Foster Author

 

"Mental toughness is many things and rather difficult to explain. Its qualities are sacrifice and self-denial. Also, most importantly, it is combined with a perfectly disciplined will that refuses to give in. It's a state of mind-you could call it character in action." — Vince Lombardi

 

"A successful career will no longer be about promotion. It will be about mastery." — Michael Hammer

 

 

 

"Mountaintops inspire leaders but valleys mature them." — Winston Churchill

 

"Everybody starts at the top, and then has the problem of staying there. Lasting accomplishment, however, is still achieved through a long, slow climb and self-discipline."

- Helen Hayes

 

 Let me . . . ; remind you that it is only by working with an energy which is almost superhuman and which looks to uninterested spectators like insanity that we can accomplish anything worth the achievement. Work is the keystone of a perfect life. Work and trust in God." — Woodrow Wilson

 

"The most important thing in the Olympic Games is not winning but taking part; the essential thing in life is not conquering but fighting well." — Pierre de Coubertin, founder of modern Olympic Games

 

 
"Happiness is dependent on self-discipline. We are the biggest obstacles to our own happiness. It is much easier to do battle with society and with others than to fight our own nature."
- Dennis Prager

 I think self-discipline is something, it's like a muscle. The more you exercise it, the stronger it gets.
- Daniel Goldstein

Self-discipline is an act of cultivation. It require you to connect today's actions to tomorrow's results. There's a season for sowing a season for reaping. Self-discipline helps you know which is which.
- Gary Ryan Blair

 "It is necessary to try to surpass one's self always: this occupation ought to last as long as life." — Queen Christina of Sweden

 

 "Never suffer your courage to exert itself in fierceness, your resolution in obstinacy, your wisdom in cunning, nor your patience in sullenness and despair. " — Charles Palmer

 

 

 

The only discipline that lasts is self-discipline.

Bum Phillips

 

I see my upbringing as a great success story. By disciplining me, my parents inculcated self-discipline. And by restricting my choices as a child, they gave me so many choices in my life as an adult. Because of what they did then, I get to do the work I love now.

- Amy Chua

Long-term, we must begin to build our internal strengths. It isn't just skills like computer technology. It's the old-fashioned basics of self-reliance, self-motivation, self-reinforcement, self-discipline, self-command.

- Steven Pressfield

"Nothing is more harmful to the service, than the neglect of discipline; for that discipline, more than numbers, gives one army superiority over another." — George Washington

Whether you call it Buddhism or another religion, self-discipline, that's important. Self-discipline with awareness of consequences.

- Dalai Lama

 

If you set goals for yourself, and you're like a lot of other people, you probably realize it's not that your goals are physically impossible that's keeping you from achieving them; it's that you lack the self-discipline to stick to them. It's physically possible to lose weight. It's physically possible to exercise more.
Daniel Goldstein

 

"Hold yourself responsible for a higher standard than anybody else expects of you. Never excuse yourself. Never pity yourself. Be a hard master to yourself-and be lenient to everybody else." — Henry Ward Beecher

Teaching Dance: Work or Play?

Many people always come up to me and say "Wah you teach dancing full time ah?  So lucky to be able to work on something that you like!"  And unspoken in that is 'how I wish I could be like that and have a full time job on something that I love too'.

It's funny that many people think teaching dance just consists of going into the class, telling a bunch of people on what steps to take, how to take them, turn on the music and viola!..

The dance classes come about because of a series of things that are needed to be done to accumulate in an event that is the class.  Most people don't see all the work that goes on into this.  There are students to call for class, there are students schedules to arrange, there are syllabus and choreographies to be set up.  The prep work is significant, like many other kinds of jobs.  It is fun, but the hours are long, and topsy turvy to regular work hours (yeah, we work retail hours).

Honestly, I don't consider teaching work.  I enjoy sharing and teaching people, especially if I have a lot to share with them and they are like absorbent sponges.  What I consider work is the stuff that everyone else considers work: paying the bills, admin stuff, organizing schedules, settling enquiries, marketing and other stuff.  Teaching is the time that I make friends, socialize, contribute to society by sharing my knowledge with others.  Setting syllabi and choreographies are also not work, coz I genuinely enjoy the creation process, and it's my fun time.

I'm immensely grateful to be in a job that I love and that I enjoy doing.  I'm glad that I can have so much fun in my work, that I can make great and awesome friends, and that I can share so many things with many people and watch them grow and mature from beginners into great dancers.  It's so amazing to see their love, passion and appreciation for life grow through dancing.  I truly enjoy that and I am super humbled by this grace God has given me to be able to impact many people's lives.

I used to think that my talents are small and minor in the light of the things of the world.  I mean, what is dance compared to saving people's lives in medicine, or the ability to create amazing technologies, build fantastic houses and other things.  But now, I see the value I bring to people's lives, sometimes more than what money can buy.  In the mature people, I help them to maintain their fitness and health; I keep their feet and mind nimble, helping in the prevention of diseases so prevalent among the aged in our society.  In the young, I aid in building their coordination, musicality, discipline and help them to expend their energy, giving them a better, healthier and disciplined body to help in their mind studies and more.  In the teens and young adults, I can help build their aspirations, inspire them to be better people, give them avenues to mature into beautiful people, learn social skills and build relationships.  It's an awesome job when you actually step back and think about it.  It's humbling that I've been given such a position of influence, yet scary at the same time that it can seem like such a huge daunting task that is my life's calling.  (And this is where I'm glad that I have a God who guides me in all things I do)...

There is one thing that people do say to me quite often that I find frustrating...  They see that I work long hours and everyday, and think, "Wah you poor thing! You work so long hours, and everyday somemore.  Must make sure you have enough rest and have time for yourself."  They are well-meaning when they say that, but what they say is not exactly in my best interests, nor is it entirely accurate.

Yes, it is true that I clock long hours at my dance school, but this is also true of many people and their jobs: when work must be completed, we need to make an effort to finish them.  I just work slow (but I'm getting faster!).  Also, my work and play time has grey areas because they both occur in the same place, and I think this is the most misleading  part.  People can't see clearly when my work/play place and time are, because they occur in the same place, and much at the same time.

When I teach, it's play.  When I do admin stuff, it's work.  When I talk to students, it's sometimes work, sometimes play.  Admittedly, I had big problems differentiating between work and play when I first started doing this full time.  I still get confused from time to time, even now, after 10 years.  So I can't really expect others to be able to differentiate between my work and play time.  On top of that (as if it's not confusing enough), the people whom I teach and work with are also the people I spend my play time with.  It can get a tad frustrating if you let it get to you, but the benefits far outweigh the costs:

1)  I'm paid to do what I love, while others pay to do what they love.  By working in what I love, I am doing things that I enjoy most of the time.

2)  I save time and money on commuting to and fro.  Even though work and play can get confusing because they are both occurring in the same place,  one major advantage of this is that I can spend more time doing these things coz I don't have to factor in traveling time.  Many people spend 3 - 5 (or more) hours traveling from home to work to play and back home.  I don't have to do that, and as a result I can spend more productive time contributing to the things I love.  I can also concentrate all my energies to do these things, rather than worrying about rushing from one place to another.

3)  I get to work and play with the people I like, my friends!

4)  As mentioned earlier, I get to play a small role in enriching people's lives through dancing, health and more.  It's a true privilege.

5)  This one's a little bit chim, but the way we work, play and eat together, we live in a communal setting and this 'family' feeling is essential to our lives and welfare.  At times, it may seem stifling and over bearing, but I'm surrounded by people who care for me and vice versa.  We look out for each other, and even though we all have our flaws, we are a family.

By learning to give, being grateful and collaborating with one another, we can work together to do great things for our community and to help people around us, things that we cannot do as individuals.

On Learning...

Teaching many students over the years, I've learned a thing or 2 about what makes students more teachable.

 
The best kinds of students a teacher could hope to get are those that are like a clean slate.  They don't have any prior opinions, they don't seem to know anything and they trust you to show them how to do it all.  Students like that are a dream come true because we don't have to spend time convincing them why they should do this rather then do that, why doing this will make you better than doing that, etc. 

For example, if I have 5 minutes with each student, I can spend that 5 minutes trying to convince the student to do Task 1 and why doing Task 1 will help them to improve, or I can spend the precious 5 minutes showing and teaching them to do Tasks 1,2 and 3.

Here is an illustration:

Teacher, "You must practice your spins everyday. Do it 3 times a day, for 5 minutes each."

Student, "Why do I have to do it?  I get so dizzy when I spin.  I'm so busy also, everyday is not possible."

Teacher (starts explaining and convincing the student to do the homework), "Spins are important in dancing.  When you first practice, you will find it hard, but if you practice everyday, you will improve and won't get so dizzy within a week or two....."

Or the conversation could go this way...

Teacher, "You must practice your spins everyday. Do it 3 times a day, for 5 minutes each."
Student, "OK i will do my best.  What else should I work on?"
Teacher (delighted in such a dedicated student replies), "Besides spinning, practice your isolations too.  After spinning, you can do body isolations for 5 - 10 minutes.  If you have more time, you can...."

If a student doesn't keep second guessing the teacher or thinks he knows better or his way is better, the teacher doesn't have to waste time thinking "How can I convince the student that my method of learning has been taught to many students, and all who followed my instructions wholeheartedly all succeeded and became good dancers?"  The teacher can then spend more of his energy to focus on how to make the student an even better dancer. 

I'm not suggesting that the student should blindly follow the teacher, but I feel that the students should not judge the teacher during the class (is what this teacher is saying better than what the other teacher taught me to do the other day?  I think that if I do it this way, it is better than what the teacher is saying now...). 

You take a class to learn.  Reserve your judgements for after the class.  During the class, learn all that you can, take all that you can from the teacher.  Even if you don't agree, put your opinions aside first.  Your teacher may have a different approach to what you are used to learning but it may produce the same or better results, but you never know it works if you don't try with an open mind.

You are there to learn, not teach the teacher or disrespect or humiliate him.  So focus your energies on learning.  If the teacher is open to it, you can share what you feel and humbly and respectfully present your opinions to him after the class.  But don't go into an argument with him in the class.

Working as a freelancer vs working in a team.

Pros & Cons:

Going outside as a freelancer gives you immediate benefits.  You can take up immediately what is on offer: like teaching with other schools, getting to choose your time and place your efforts in the things you want to do.

Working together using GGC may not seem like the best or most popular thing to do, but we can work in a group and grow together as a group.  If we have a clear idea of where we want to go and a have true goal to work towards, we have the potential to create something truly big.  We do hard honest work that slowly but steadily grow towards a larger goal.  An immediate benefit is that we don't have to bear the stress, load and burden alone.  When we stumble, we have others around us to hold on to us and to keep the boat rowing.  Even though it is harder and you need more patience (no immediate gratification), you can go further as a group, build bigger and stronger.

Compare this to building a house.  1 man can build a hut or a simple house.  It will take a couple of weeks and eventually, you can have a small hut that you can call your own.  It is simple, small and cosy, but it fits only 2 to 4 people.  A group of 7 men can organize a larger group of 30-50 men to build a large 50 storey building.  It may take 1-2 years (there is no immediate gratification) and you can't claim all the credit (you have to share it with 50 other people), but in the end, you have a 50 storey condominium with a swimming pool, gym, supermarket, garden, etc, and you can enjoy it with many friends.

One immediate downside that I see as a freelancer is that although you are free to make your own choices and decide what you want to do, most people usually don't have the experience to understand the market or the business.  They typically flit around taking whatever short term businesses they can do. 

It is rare that they would be able to plan far ahead as they would get so caught up in the little everyday things that they have no bandwidth or time to plan ahead to grow their business.  The upside to working in a GGC team is that there is a clearer picture of where we go as a group; sometimes, you don't have to plan the route or even know the whole picture (this is especially so if you are a junior in the team).  All you need to do is to trust your superior, follow instructions and you will be able to reap the benefits of the task.  And eventually when you have enough experience and expertise, you can take over the reins as leader and lead the group, but this will happen only after you prove that you have the ability to handle it and care enough to look out for everyone in the group.

Self Discipline & Care Enough

We can miss out on 99% of our blessing because we don't have the discipline or care enough to finish the things we start.  You can do everything right, persevere on through hard times but stop at the 98% mark and still not enjoy the success.  If I were to make a rocking chair, I assemble everything together bit by bit, with everything all done up except the chair seat, I could have spent many hours and days making the chair, but I still cannot use it because of that one last thing I need to put in.  I may have spent all that effort, but it would be wasted because I cannot reap the benefits of what I have made. 

There are times we all want to sleep a little bit longer, eat a little bit unhealthier, be a little bit lazier, but these things make life a lot more difficult.  Back to the chair analogy, if I had done everything, but was lazy and did not put one screw into the rocking chair, I may have an accident a few months down when my parents use the chair or a little nephew plays on it.  They may fall and injure themselves, just because I was a bit lazy and did not put enough care into finishing what I started.  I may have put a lot of love into making the rocking chair, but by deciding not to put in that screw because of my 1% lazy indulgence and assumption that it won't matter, I have caused injury or harm to others and myself.  Furthermore, nobody will trust in the rocking chairs I make in the future.

Real & Disciplined Balanced Lifestyle

Real and Disciplined Balanced Lifestyle
1.    Wake up early:  7.30am awake,   8.30am open shutter  (if not around, must have accountability)
2.    Drink 2 glasses of water  (to replenish water lost during the night)
3.    Exercise  (to get the engine running for the day)
4.    Eat Healthy  (to put the right nutrients into the body for energy and freshness )
5.    We are a support group:  ensure that we do these things together every morning  (exception for off day).
6.    Daily Work Tasks

Success to this game = acquiring great habits such that it doesn’t feel much like hard / tedious work anymore. 
Success also means more free time on our hands.  By increasing the speed of our tasks and the quality of our tasks, we have more time to pursue other things and plan for new exciting things.  We will become on top of our work and handle matters before due date;  we become proactive rather than reactive. We will be HAPPY.
By changing ourselves and our mindsets, we can attain success! =)

Normal vs Exceptional People

Routine of a Normal Person:

5am : wake up, exercise, go market

6am - 6pm : go to work, accomplish 20 work tasks

6pm - 11pm : take dance class / teach dance class, social dance, socialize

Daily Personal tasks: 25 tasks (exercise, go market, dance, socialize, cook, laundry, etc)

A regular person accomplishes 20 work tasks and about 25 personal tasks every day.

An exceptional person accomplishes more.  Exceptional people in work accomplishes 30 - 50 tasks a day at the initial stage, and progress to 100 things a day at work. 

Exceptional people then progress to become managers, senior managers and CEOs.  As they go higher up, they do lesser tasks but each task has higher points (eg, 30 - 50 points to manage a staff to do his 20 tasks which are 1 - 10 points in nature).  This gives them more free time on their hands but the problems they handle need more time, effort and heart to solve.

The way to success is to develop good habits to be able to do their required tasks everyday (and more), and to do it with a positive mindset.

“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values,
Your values become your destiny.”
― Mahatma Gandhi

“Sow a thought, and you reap an act;
Sow an act, and you reap a habit;
Sow a habit, and you reap a character;
Sow a character, and you reap a destiny.”
― Samuel Smiles

“It will be difficult to break the habits of thinking (...) instilled in me, like tugging a single thread from a complex work of embroidery. But I will find new habits, new thoughts, new rules. I will become something else.”
― Veronica Roth, Divergent

“Motivation is what gets you started. Habit is what keeps you going.”
― Jim Ryun

“H is for Habit, winners make a habit of doing the things losers don't want to do.”
― Lucas Remmerswaal, The A-Z of 13 Habits: Inspired by Warren Buffett
“The only way we could remember would be by constant re-reading, for knowledge unused tends to drop out of mind. Knowledge used does not need to be remembered; practice forms habits and habits make memory unnecessary. The rule is nothing; the application is everything.”
― Henry Hazlitt, Thinking as a Science 

“Just do it! First you make your habits, then your habits make you!”
― Lucas Remmerswaal, The A-Z of 13 Habits: Inspired by Warren Buffett
“Good habits are the basic tools that will determine whether you are a tortoise
or hare in life!”
― Lucas Remmerswaal, 13 Habits.com the Tale of Tortoise Buffett and Trader Hare
“Habits define who we are from the outside in, more than who we are defines us from the inside out.”
― Jarod Kintz, 99 Cents For Some Nonsense
“Courage is a requirement for facing your fears, doing things differently, and applying any new habits that align with and support your goals.”
― John Manning, The Disciplined Leader: Keeping the Focus on What Really Matters
“Habits of action cultivated early in life lay the foundation for unique skill sets able to carve a path beyond the mundane and into the relevant.”
― Marian Deegan, Relevance: Matter More